Transition Part 3 of 3: School

I spent a day on campus last week, to see my various graduate advisers, and get the remainder of my class schedule sorted out. I gotta tell ya, it felt good. Really good.

I knew I missed the student life, but I never realized just how much I missed it. Sitting in the semi-plush chairs in the Engineering Lounge, sipping coffee and plugging away on the free wi-fi while the hustle of students milled around and conducted their various school and non-school related tasks. It made me feel young, and alive. I know thats a strange thing for a 24 year old to say, but having spent some time in the "real world" has really aged me.

When I was younger, my mother would always say how our family liked school so much, most of us never left. Which is true, almost every member of my extended family is involved with one university or another in some faculty related function. I always used to scoff in my head, and think that it was just because they were dorks. But really, its pretty sweet being a dork. You have intellectually challenging activities every day, don't have to worry about bosses (in the traditional sense), get to keep your own schedule (for the most part), and never really stagnate as is common in the working world.

I feel like school will be a good thing for me. I can continue to better myself, and improve what I have to offer; while at the same time get away from the hum-drum working world and live as a student for just a little while longer. As for all the logistics of quitting my job and going back to school at a time like this, I still think it's the best thing for me.

I have been wholly un-affected by the financial crisis to date. I have no mortgage, no short term stock investments, my car is paid off, I have no kids, and the 2 years worth of retirement I have accumulated has lost a net of $73.92 since the economic meltdown started. Many companies, including mine, are going through force reductions in the next year or so. But I'll be in school during all that. I will be leaving on my own terms, before I get laid off (which may or may not have happened), and will avoid the worst year my company will see in a long time. And I may even get to come back at a higher salary into a leaner company after school finishes.

My school is funded by loans. Which is un-fortunate, but the federal loans are un-affected by the financial crisis, so I don't need to worry about getting another one next semester. My professor is extremely excited to have me on his TA staff next semester because I have come through his program, and he and I were good friends while I was an undergraduate. The best part is that TAships pay for school, and give you a stipend! So it is likely that I will only need to get through this first semester on loans, and even then, I will supplement my loan with an hourly job to bring in a little spending cash. There is also a remote possibility that in a year or so, I could work with the lab I was employed with as an undergraduate as a designer for their new Mars program . Thats a long shot, but it would be a dream come true.

I feel that this decision is the right one. I avoid all the ugliness of a force reduction at my job, get a higher-education degree, and will come back in a better position to get the work I want, and an even better salary than the one that I have grown accustomed to.

So it is with a clenched fist and head held high, that I begin the transition back to student.
Now if only they'd post the text-book list...
-Ty

pic via CU

Transition Part 2 of 3: Freakout

The most prevalent thought running through my head recently has been

Holy Crap I Quit My Job!

What am I doing!?! I'm 24 years old for crying out loud! I was a design engineer for a huge engineering corporation. I had job security, I was doing design, the work I want to be doing. Sure it was on boring rockets, but you gotta make some sacrifices yeah? What the hell was I thinking!?!

Whenever I tell someone that I quit my job recently, the most common question I get asked is

Aren't you afriad of quitting during these difficult economic times? When people are being layed off, and the un-employment rate is skyrocketing, aren't you concerned about leaving your job?

And that's a pretty scary thought. Yeah, people ARE getting laid off by the thousands, people have lost large portions of their retirement funds to the crashing stock markets, and there are real fears of another Great Depression. Am I being stupid and naive to give up my good paying job and semi-satisfying career right now? Sure, moving around is perfectly normal, but is it wise to do it now?

I am a little afraid of change. Who wouldn't be? Why risk what you have in the pursuit of what you might not get? It seems stupid to give up a bird in the hand for 2 in the bush.

On top of all that, I am, as of 10:35pm December 21st, 2009 in $10199 of debt to the united states government. That may not seem like a lot to most of you, but it is my biggest loan yet, and for being my sole source of income, its a bit of a doozy.

I view my time working for the corporate monster as something similar to being in an abusive relationship. In the beginning, you know somethings not right, but you can't really put your finger on it. Then you start to feel depressed and a little pained, until one day, you forget that those feelings aren't normal, and you learn to live with it. You even miss the pain when its gone, because it doesn't feel like a weight has been lifted, but rather something is missing. In the same way a drug addict gets used to the high, I have begun to get used to the low of the corporate environment. I think that when I pack my cubicle, and return to the hustle and bustle of the student life, that I will miss the stagnant comfort of the padded walls, and soothing demeanor of the office paint scheme.

It's the end of a dark, but significant, era in my life, and I will be a little sorry to see it go.
-Ty

pic via Brokertov

Transition Part 1 of 3: Quit

So I quit my job today.

By quit, I mean I sent in my official resignation letter today. I actually told my manager and the HR rep last week, but that was just to get my work transition started.

I had always planned to quit. I think from the 2nd month I started here, I was ready to quit. I stayed on with the company for 1 year, as recommended, to work through the bump and grind of starting a new job. And after 1 year, I started making plans to leave, the culmination of which, is today.

I grew up without a job, well, I worked at Nordstroms for a summer, but other than that I never had to work. All during college I worked at a research laboratory on campus. So I was quite shell-shocked when I arrived into the large corporation engineering world. The taupe walls, the buildings, un-renovated since the 1970's, the cubicles, the dress code, all served to send me into what can only be described as a depressed, numbed, emotional state. Before working here I could never understand how someone could say

I've worked with this company for 35 years!

without breaking into tears for having a wasted life. But now, I think there are 2 reasons a person could say that. The first, and as I have observed, the more likely, is that they are trying to convince themselves that they like where they are instead of realizing that their current situation is not driven so much by liking what they do, as fear of what could be worse. The second reason is that they truly ARE proud to be where they are, and they actually DO find enjoyment out of what they do.

While the second reason is much less likely than the first, it is what I long for. To be satisfied intellectually, financially, and socially with a job to the extent that working there for an extended period of time would be not only acceptable, but preferred and desired. But there is a certain allure to the stagnant lifestyle, to becoming complacent, to hiding from change for fear of losing what I already have. And I have quite a bit! I have financial independence from my parents, a job that pays for more than my needs and wants at this point in my life, a wonderful girlfriend, and a comfortable home. There is quite a bit to fear to lose. But I can not allow myself to fall into complacency and apathy for my career lest I risk my spirit. Lest I risk becoming one of the neutered drones I see wandering past my cubicle every day, lost in a sea of taupe foam dividers.

I have always planned on returning to school. It was never a question of whether or not I would, simply a question of when. My friends, today is that day. From here, I move forward.
-Ty

The Votes are In!

It's been a while since my last post, things have been crazy busy. I promise I will elaborate on all the juicy bits in the near future.

But for right now, I think it's about time to change that title bar picture, would you agree?

For those of you who voted (and there were quite a bit more than I thought) 90% of you got it right. The image was in fact, the NCC-1701 Enterprise from the new Star Trek movie!


The image is credited to snarkerati.com (or that's where I got it from anyway).

This was a pretty easy one to start with since most of the readers are nerds like me! It'll get more difficult in the future I promise.

The new image and voting system are up so give it a try! And I've scrambled the image name so you can't just download it and read the title...cheaters.

Congrats to you who got it, and good luck in this next round!
-Ty